After many days of falling deeply in llove with yet another man Iona finds her heart crushed in the same manner as the last one.
She walks in feeling the change in the air and wonders,.... what ever is about to transpire will have a great impact on her life and the families. Its then that her daughter Wynd walks in and says..."Mommy I feel a great change in the air and a shift in the winds and not sure what it is but its going to affect us all in some way."
Iona replies " I feel it too dear and I am not sure what it is but I do know it has to do with Krysus cause my heart is acking on what I am about to face."
They sit and discuse things further and as she ends her day her daughter and Wynds twin Soul enters. She too knows somethings in the air but what? With her daughters at her side she walks into the room she so loves and takes pride in its grandure. Upon entering she sees a letter sitting on the desk addressed to her. His presence still lingering in the air as she picks up the sealed envelope, opens it with ergency and reads. The first sentince starts the first of many tears that will fall this night.
She begins reading out load to her girls so they can know what it is they all are to face...
I'm not seeing anybody and I'm not mad at you (and wasn't when I went offline). I decided outright that I just really needed a break and if I were to have brought it up to you, it wouldn't have happened because of some unnecessary over-whelming guilt that you seem to instill in me. I don't know when I'm going to be back, but please don't try to find ways of questioning and making me feel like it is wrong, because it is my choice.
This is how it is and when I'm ready I will come back around. Don't reply back, I already know you are hurt and confused and that you love me. But there are factors here that have been making me go out of my mind including the constant overwhelming seriousness, and the fact that we are so far apart and that we don't get to see each other in person. I'm going to be realistic with myself and no lie to myself anymore.
I love you, but I don't know what that love is because I havn't experienced you for myself yet actually in person, and until then, I'm not going to lie to myself anymore and think that my love for you is whole and complete. It can't be and it wont be. I don't know if I can keep on with a relationship like this where we keep wanting to feel things that aren't going to be there truthfully until we see each other. I know you'll be hurt by this, I wouldn't expect any less and it hurts to have to do all this and tell you all this. All I know for sure is that we need a break. I need space, and if anything at all, I just need your friendship. I couldn't breath with all the overwhelming seriousness that we were constantly trying to play out. I didn't feel like we had a friendship anymore. If you understand what I mean, then you'll just be my freind for a while and let us take some time a part for a while.
Yes, you have had a giant impact on me, and I do still deeply care about you and I want all the happiness in the world for you, but I have fallen in way over my head here and you don't deserve somebody who has done what I have done, setting all this up when he doesn't feel he can have his heart that much into it under the current circumstances.
After you read this, don't message me back, I already know many things you'll say, feel, and question. Just read this, close it, and do whatever you have to do to take your time and understand me and what I'm saying, cry if you need to, feel whatever you'll feel (but don't take it out on the Rose, they need you), take some time focus on what you have going on there. I'm not dissapearing for good, I'm taking a break, and when I get back, I need us to be friends. Because on a level that goes beyond intamacy, I love you, and our current circumstance is going to do it no justice for us until we better utilize the bond of freindship we have until the day we meet. When I get back, and when you are back from any time you take, I will be here for you to talk to again, but there are things I absolutely have to give more focus on and I seem to keep failing at doing it when I know you are around. That is my own doing, not yours, and I'm doing something about that. Please be well Sharleen, and give Amanda a big hug for me and tell her she will see and hear from me again. I promise you that.
--
- G. E. Marrs
aka Krysus
-she drops to her knees and does not speak a word and collapses from a broken heart- last words spoken that momment are...
"he said history has a tendency to repeat itself "