Journal Entry: How I've Evolved Myself

-Sits down at his office desk, takes out his personal journal. The thoughts in his head begins churning, flowing out onto his hands, fingers, and finally through the ink traveling onto the pages-

--------------------------------------------------------

Wouldn’t it be cool to be able to plug yourself into a computer and download wicked updates to your brain? It reminds me of the Matrix. What if in a sense, you actually could do this, and you just didn’t know it?

Of course, I’m not literally talking about plugging your brain into a computer Matrix. What I’m talking about is actually being able to consciously upgrade yourself to be even better than who you were previously.

I’m sure you’re thinking “Well as we grow, don’t we do that anyway by natural learning through life?” and the answer of course is Yes!

But -

How many people learn how to “learn better”? That probably sounds odd, so let me clarify – how many people learn how to actually upgrade their ability to think clearer and live happier?

It’s odd to me that I hear of so few people who actually contemplate this. Most people think that they are pre-set into who they are, how they work, and that it isn’t possible (or it isn’t good) to change the mechanisms in how they behave. But how could it not be? Look around you and you’ll see people who are living examples that it is possible, that it is necessary.

Sometime before my daughter was born, I had a life changing experience. It inspired me to go through a series of changes that would evolve my understanding and survival through a new life. The problem was, I could never come up with a clear explanation of what I was doing and how I was changing, until now.

So let me illustrate by sharing with you a before and after picture. The before is called the “old model of living” and the after is my “new model of living”.

The Old Model of Living

The old model of living for me has manifested many sources of anxiety. This included worrying about the future (what am I going to do tomorrow, next week, next month), worrying about what other people think of me, how much money I need to make, the condition of how I’m living, etc.

The old model says that life is (and should be) objectively perceived. This means that my reality has control over me instead of me having control (accountability) over my reality. If I were to live by only my own perception, I am in “la la land”, and not living in true reality.

The old model offered up a dozen and one reasons I should be able to own lots of nice things and have a lot to show for through things like a nice house.

This is a model for setting top expectations for things around me, living by what a significant other expects from me, and abiding by the rules of society.

It says I am required to believe in a God to make the most out of who I am and the life that I have.

There are many other details to this model, but these are probably the most essential to me.

Now lets have a look at the new model.

My New Model of Living

The new model of living is almost completely opposite from the old model. In this new model, I live only in the present. I make the most out of it without worrying what condition I’m in right now or in 5 years. Mind you, it’s not a bad idea to want to be in a good place in 5 years. However, revolving my every day around worry of the future limits my ability to create the most out of the present, which is the very thing that makes the future and it’s conditions what they become.

Also, under this new model, I have detached from what others think about me, my past, my present, and my future. This isn’t to say that what friends and family members think doesn’t matter to me. It simply means that my inner personal layers will function and grow without having to rely on what they think. In summary, outside opinions are well moderated and filtered according to what is personally relevant to me and if it’s actually aligned with logical truth.

This new model harbors an entirely new and dynamic perception of reality: subjective reality. In this new model, I am the center of my experience of the world. My life is made up of what I do, what I feel, and what I choose to think. Therefore, it is powered by my own perception of the world. Logically, because of this, I have power over this reality to adopt/create ways of thinking that can mentally improve me. There are perceptions I can adopt and create that can empower me to think clearer, faster, and more efficiently about anything I want. I can program myself to detach from stress, expect the unexpected, accept what many would normally not be able to, and amplify my motivation for action at proper times.

I have no attachments to having nice things under this new model of living. I am a minimalist. Under this model, minimalism is essential because it means I have less things to keep up with, less things to manage, less things to clean, and so, less things to worry about. I also choose to claim no personal ownership over the majority of what I possess. Learning to live with less will shift my world from being concerned about what I own and don’t own, to focusing on what I do and don’t do to boost personal productivity. It means more space to live, less to clean, and a much more relaxing environment as well.

In this new model, capitalism has less power over me. In fact, society as a whole has less claim over who I am and what I choose to become and do. This doesn’t mean that I rebel and boycott things. It means that I am simply less involved in the cliche’s and boxes that today’s society steers people into as it’s way of creating order, feeding the market, and putting a label on everyone. I realize that regardless of the condition of the economy and society, I am whoever and whatever I wish to be. I don’t need a million dollars to do what I love.

Finally, within this new model, I do not feel the need to follow or even believe in a God to make sense of my life. Having something to believe in at all is a vital part of living. But I have the freedom to dictate whatever it is that I choose to believe. It doesn’t have to be a god of any kind. My “God” could be music if I wish, or it could simply be the act of manifesting the greater good of all. But what if I chose to build a belief of my own that amplifies all parts of who I am and what I can do? Interesting...

I don’t believe I’m pre-determined to anybody or anything. I am a living canvas. I can apply or take from it at any time. The only thing that I cannot change and would never change however, is the canvas itself. It all seems to put an interesting spin on life when you revolve it around creating something awesome out of yourself, doesn’t it?

--------------------------------------------------------

-Pauses with a smile, puts his quill into his ink cup, waits for the ink to dry, and closes the book. His curiosity now lies on what thoughts the others in the family might have about this journal entry-

-after some time passes and I wander into his office on a morning hes absent I see the Journal I have gifted him. I open the book slowly and see its first entry- hmmm I only have one view on the ownership of personal items...

-picking up the quile I begin to place my responce-

One does claim things like this for a very good reason in life, and its simple really.

As a male it shows you can actually have something that is stable and suitable for creating things that one desires from others. Such as attracting a mate, or showing your children they have stability.

Yes you can give these things in other ways and fashions but in the end its the memories of life one creats. Even in a job one does enjoy the thoughts of having Job security.

To own a house means so much more then it being an object of self gain and showmanship of ones wealth or modesty. Yes its true not everything in life can have a security but that is also a lesson in time we all learn at some point.

Its like when a robin builds a nest for his Mate. The better its built the better it will survive the winds and storm nature (life) brings. Thus the better chance he has in providing his family (the eggs) a good survival rate.

So the unmaterial things are not the only things we need to survive.
but placing a value on them to a degree of saying you cant survive without it is another issue completely different then said discussion.

I liked your thoughts on the god Modeling, but I will leave it at that for another days discussion.

-smiles at the entry and knows all to well he knows what she means and closes the book as the day is just beginning-